July 7, 2013
As transcendent as the Ananda/traveling experience has been, the fellow karma yogis and I all share a similar worry. Going home.
Environment is stronger than will. We all sought out a spiritual place because we fell out of balance in the lives we were living. Reintegrating back into society with its distractions and temptations is a real threat to the stillness we're working to create in ourselves.
The spiritual path isn't an easy one. It's a constant test of faith, not just in universal energies but also faith that only we truly know what's best for ourselves. Obtaining inner peace isn't a passive process, it is a battle. It's easy to surrender to life's chaos in tumultuous duality, to give in to the ebb and flow of worldly happiness and sadness. In the Bhagavad Gita it describes the constant battle between dark and light within the consciousness of man. But we mustn't repress the dark, we must accept it and outshine the dark with the light. One can never find peace through passivity, it's through the noble fight of overcoming all negative aspects of life and of our consciousness.
In alchemy our consciousness is represented by a dark cave, and our shadow consciousness, (where the negative aspects of ourselves and the things we repress live) is represented by a fierce dragon. We can never kill this dragon, though. We can only hope to tame it to the point where it no longer serves as a threat. After we tame the fierce dragon he is represented as the friendly green dragon.
It takes a determined mind to obtain clarity in the face of duality. Because of the very nature of duality, there is joy in painful experience, and pain in joy. Mostly we discover this in retrospect, but even in immense worldly happiness we can find darkness as we understand the inevitable end to such happiness. Knowledge itself is a source of great pain as well as happiness. Life is a constant roller coaster of ups and downs and we are not easily detached from this relative, cyclical, and contradictory world. It takes a spiritual warrior to drown darkness with light and to also stay detached from worldly happiness and sadness as they understand it is transient. Yogananda said, "A saint is just a sinner who never gave up."
Real joy lays in the application of ones will, in giving, in expansion. In divine bliss there is no opposite. It's complete freedom, overcoming all obstacles in our consciousness where we can thrive in a reality with no boundaries. It's here we can dance along the boarders of parallel realities, feel the pulse of the universe in our cells and understand our power as divine creators.
"Defeat exists, but not suffering. A true warrior knows that when he
loses a battle he is improving the skill with which he wields a sword.
He will be able to fight more skillfully next time. "
Paulo Coelho
Friday, August 23, 2013
Dancing Through Life
July, 1, 2013
The natural builders of Ananda invited us to the Stonehouse to go dancing. They were having an event with all female dj's. I've never danced to electronic music before and... was terrified. I decided to put all my centering work I've been doing at Ananda to the test... and I tried real hard to not make eye contact with anyone. I'd be forced to give an awkward smile and then they'd know I'm totally out of my element. Classic projection, I know.
I sat for a long time on the sidelines watching all kinds of people dance. Some swayed back and forth in their own rhythm, some people were jumping and running around the dance floor, using their whole body. It was so interesting to feel the energy of the music and watch how each individual got lost in it and expressed it in their unique way.
I hoped someone would force me out on the dance floor, but realized it was going to be up to me. Eventually I summoned up the courage to find my own rhythm to this foreign and unpredictable music... the key for me was to close my eyes, suppress judgement and just learn it. I let go into the energy and eventually found my flow.
The interesting thing about electronic music is that it's so unpredictable. The sound changes so suddenly and if you're dancing to it you're forced to adapt really quickly. As the night progressed I got better and faster at adapting to the quick changes and figuring out how to move to the beats I'm unfamiliar with.
I understand how people say life is like a dance. We can learn to surrender to the flow and when life changes abruptly we can learn to adapt quickly to stay in the flow.
Our ability to adapt with life and keep our stillness in times of transition is more than half the battle.
The natural builders of Ananda invited us to the Stonehouse to go dancing. They were having an event with all female dj's. I've never danced to electronic music before and... was terrified. I decided to put all my centering work I've been doing at Ananda to the test... and I tried real hard to not make eye contact with anyone. I'd be forced to give an awkward smile and then they'd know I'm totally out of my element. Classic projection, I know.
I sat for a long time on the sidelines watching all kinds of people dance. Some swayed back and forth in their own rhythm, some people were jumping and running around the dance floor, using their whole body. It was so interesting to feel the energy of the music and watch how each individual got lost in it and expressed it in their unique way.
I hoped someone would force me out on the dance floor, but realized it was going to be up to me. Eventually I summoned up the courage to find my own rhythm to this foreign and unpredictable music... the key for me was to close my eyes, suppress judgement and just learn it. I let go into the energy and eventually found my flow.
The interesting thing about electronic music is that it's so unpredictable. The sound changes so suddenly and if you're dancing to it you're forced to adapt really quickly. As the night progressed I got better and faster at adapting to the quick changes and figuring out how to move to the beats I'm unfamiliar with.
I understand how people say life is like a dance. We can learn to surrender to the flow and when life changes abruptly we can learn to adapt quickly to stay in the flow.
Our ability to adapt with life and keep our stillness in times of transition is more than half the battle.
Thursday, August 1, 2013
A Sense of Community
June 27, 2013
Yesterday was a amazing day. I had the morning off so Tom and I went to Mother Truckers (a health food convenience store) and then down to the Yuba river. Tom is such an interesting guy, he's very soft spoken and at first seems distant but really he's very warm and insightful. We sat on some big rocks by the river and talked about the idea of renunciation and life purpose. We both felt like nothing can be really gained from forced renunciation, that it really creates repression which isn't conducive to evolution. To deny our human nature is to deny an aspect of ourselves instead of accept it. I feel we must learn to open our hearts and love ourselves unconditionally. This means accepting all our weaknesses and "faults".
Later that day a group of us (Clark, Tom, Frank, Celia, Cheni) all went to swimming in the Yuba. We had to climb down a very steep hill down to the river which was full of smooth white rocks and boulders. The river created a little lagoon that was pretty deep and surrounded by rocks and little waterfalls. The water was cold and felt clean and pure. A place for cliff diving too, there was a huge boulder we could jump off into the river. It was scary every. single. time. But so therapeutic.
Later that night Frank and I were on our way to Lotus Lake to do the Gayatri when we ran into Clark. He was on evening shift and someone didn't show up for the shift. The evening shift is the worst one because you can't leave until everything gets done, so we decided to help him. Soon after that Richard stopped by looking for us and asked us if we needed help, but before we said anything he declared he was going to help us anyway. With all of us working together we got it done in record time... but most importantly was while we worked the conversation flowed. We talked about quantum physics, creating our realities, healing, manifestation, and the law of attraction. It's such an amazing feeling to talk freely about the things you're passionate about with people who are equally passionate about it. We shared experiences and knowledge and created knew ideas. Even after the shift we all stayed up half the night talking.
Richard told me about his method of healing called Theta Healing which he learned in Thailand. He helps people reprogram their minds on a subconscious level. He helps take away unwanted agreements and beliefs stored in our subconscious and replaces it with something more productive and positive. He offered to give me a session and I'm very curious to see how it works and learn from him.
It's a world of difference to be surrounded by like-minded friends. We all eat together, joke together, work together, listen to each other. We each have something different to offer in conversation, different perspectives with the same general idea in mind. Even though we all just met, it feels as if we've known each other for years. I'm learning more from the fellow karma yogis than I have in years.
There's talk about all of us starting our own retreat/commune. One that isn't dogmatic or fundamentalist. We'll have pyramids, natural building, and an aquaponics farm. It'll be a place of refuge for the spirit, a place of healing and expansion. The most exciting this is that I really feel we can achieve anything. Anything is possible if you live in the realm of Spirit, follow your heart, and your passion.
Yesterday was a amazing day. I had the morning off so Tom and I went to Mother Truckers (a health food convenience store) and then down to the Yuba river. Tom is such an interesting guy, he's very soft spoken and at first seems distant but really he's very warm and insightful. We sat on some big rocks by the river and talked about the idea of renunciation and life purpose. We both felt like nothing can be really gained from forced renunciation, that it really creates repression which isn't conducive to evolution. To deny our human nature is to deny an aspect of ourselves instead of accept it. I feel we must learn to open our hearts and love ourselves unconditionally. This means accepting all our weaknesses and "faults".
Later that day a group of us (Clark, Tom, Frank, Celia, Cheni) all went to swimming in the Yuba. We had to climb down a very steep hill down to the river which was full of smooth white rocks and boulders. The river created a little lagoon that was pretty deep and surrounded by rocks and little waterfalls. The water was cold and felt clean and pure. A place for cliff diving too, there was a huge boulder we could jump off into the river. It was scary every. single. time. But so therapeutic.
Later that night Frank and I were on our way to Lotus Lake to do the Gayatri when we ran into Clark. He was on evening shift and someone didn't show up for the shift. The evening shift is the worst one because you can't leave until everything gets done, so we decided to help him. Soon after that Richard stopped by looking for us and asked us if we needed help, but before we said anything he declared he was going to help us anyway. With all of us working together we got it done in record time... but most importantly was while we worked the conversation flowed. We talked about quantum physics, creating our realities, healing, manifestation, and the law of attraction. It's such an amazing feeling to talk freely about the things you're passionate about with people who are equally passionate about it. We shared experiences and knowledge and created knew ideas. Even after the shift we all stayed up half the night talking.
Richard told me about his method of healing called Theta Healing which he learned in Thailand. He helps people reprogram their minds on a subconscious level. He helps take away unwanted agreements and beliefs stored in our subconscious and replaces it with something more productive and positive. He offered to give me a session and I'm very curious to see how it works and learn from him.
It's a world of difference to be surrounded by like-minded friends. We all eat together, joke together, work together, listen to each other. We each have something different to offer in conversation, different perspectives with the same general idea in mind. Even though we all just met, it feels as if we've known each other for years. I'm learning more from the fellow karma yogis than I have in years.
There's talk about all of us starting our own retreat/commune. One that isn't dogmatic or fundamentalist. We'll have pyramids, natural building, and an aquaponics farm. It'll be a place of refuge for the spirit, a place of healing and expansion. The most exciting this is that I really feel we can achieve anything. Anything is possible if you live in the realm of Spirit, follow your heart, and your passion.
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